How I Knew I Had Burned Out — And Found My Way Back
I wanted to write about this because I've recently supported many people who are in a similar place—under enormous pressure, utterly exhausted, unable to feel joy or be present. It’s overwhelming and bleak. I recognise it so clearly, because I’ve been there too.
As gorgeous as the photos above are, I couldn’t look at them for years.
A few years ago, I went on the “holiday of a lifetime” with two of my best friends to Italy—Pompeii, the Isle of Ischia, and Naples. It was everything I’d dreamed of as a younger woman. For the first time, I’d found the financial stability to make it happen.
But when I look at those photos now, all I feel is the deep overwhelm and sadness I was hiding behind a mask. This was nine months before my full breakdown. These pictures are like a time machine, transporting me straight back to the pain I was in.
Despite being with wonderful, patient friends, I felt isolated and disconnected. I couldn’t shake the anxiety. I had lost my joy.
I Wasn’t Present
I couldn’t enjoy the beauty around me, be my fun self, or even relax. My mind wouldn’t let me. Even in such a stunning place, with everything I could want, I was trapped in my head—replaying anxious conversations and spiralling through what-ifs. Those thoughts were louder than reality.
Looking back, I realise I’d been feeling this way for at least three years. I hadn’t processed what had happened to me in the past—or what was happening to me then. The future felt terrifying and uncertain. That constant anxiety robbed me of joy.
That Moment
As happy as this photo looks, it represents that moment.
That moment you realise something’s wrong:
That constant feeling that you should be doing more.
The invisible threat of something terrible about to happen.
Regret about things unsaid, replaying endlessly.
The sense that everything is about to crumble.
I didn’t know it wasn’t normal. I thought this was just life. But I now understand that my anxiety was trying to scream at me to stop. I had no boundaries. I was always putting everyone else first.
Eventually, I broke.
The Turning Point
When I was signed off work for three months, the intrusive thoughts were so intense they triggered migraines and emotional crashes. My brain finally said, “Enough.”
I asked myself:
What could I control?
Why did I let it get this far?
The answer?
Everything I had done was rooted in good intentions, but without boundaries or self-prioritisation. I believed a bit of self-sacrifice would make everything more peaceful. I thought harmony meant giving more of myself away. I now know: that’s unsustainable.
My Way Back
Here’s what helped me find my way back to myself.
(1) Time
It took time, rest, and support. A lot of it.
(2) Know Yourself
I had to ask: What do I need?
Then I had to protect that with boundaries.
Knowing who I am—and why I do what I do—has helped me move forward with authenticity.
(3) Work Through the Anxiety
Anxiety isn’t the enemy. It’s a messenger.
Therapy, journaling, and self-reflection helped me understand what triggered me, what I could change, and what I needed to forgive. I’ve had hard conversations, set boundaries, and made peace with the past.
(4) Boundaries
I started saying no.
No to things that drained me.
No to people who overstepped.
Yes to what aligned with my well-being.
I learned to speak up. This video really helped me understand how to set boundaries:
(5) Find Your Way Back to You
When you're focused on everyone else, you lose sight of yourself.
Self-awareness takes time, but your future self will thank you for it.
(6) Creativity Heals
There are countless studies about creativity’s role in mental health. Doctors now prescribe it.
And yet, for years, we’ve been told it’s not “real work.”
I found my way back to creativity, and it’s played a huge part in my healing.
A Final Thought
Now, I feel more whole, not who I was, but someone more peaceful, self-aware, and ready to support others.
I plan to turn those once-triggering images into artwork, transforming pain into something beautiful.
Why not try creating your way back to yourself?
If any part of this resonated with you, please know you’re not alone. Whether you're deep in it now or slowly finding your way back, healing is possible. You can reset, reclaim your energy, your joy, and your voice.
If you're ready to begin or deepen your journey, I support people just like you through Creative Leadership and well-being sessions that prioritise your needs, because your voice, your pace, and your creativity matter.
